important, I was violently in love with an extraordinarily beautiful and fascinating girl. She
was the sister of our neighbour, Kotlovitch, a ruined landowner who had on his estate pine-
apples, marvellous peaches, lightning conductors, a fountain in the courtyard, and at the
same time not a farthing in his pocket. He did nothing and knew how to do nothing. He was
as flabby as though he had been made of boiled turnip; he used to doctor the peasants by
homeopathy and was interested in spiritualism. He was, however, a man of great delicacy
and mildness, and by no means a fool, but I have no fondness for these gentlemen who
converse with spirits and cure peasant women by magnetism. In the first place, the ideas of
people who are not intellectually free are always in a muddle, and it's extremely difficult to
talk to them; and, secondly, they usually love no one, and have nothing to do with women,
and their mysticism has an unpleasant effect on sensitive people. I did not care for his
appearance either. He was tall, stout, white-skinned, with a little head, little shining eyes,
and chubby white fingers. He did not shake hands, but kneaded one's hands in his. And he
was always apologising. If he asked for anything it was "Excuse me"; if he gave you
anything it was "Excuse me" too.
As for his sister, she was a character out of a different opera. I must explain that I had not
been acquainted with the Kotlovitches in my childhood and early youth, for my father had
been a professor at N., and we had for many years lived away. When I did make their
acquaintance the girl was twenty-two, had left school long before, and had spent two or
three years in Moscow with a wealthy aunt who brought her out into society. When I was
introduced and first had to talk to her, what struck me most of all was her rare and beautiful
name -- Ariadne. It suited her so wonderfully! She was a brunette, very thin, very slender,
supple, elegant, and extremely graceful, with refined and exceedingly noble features. Her
eyes were shining, too, but her brother's shone with a cold sweetness, mawkish as sugar-
candy, while hers had the glow of youth, proud and beautiful. She conquered me on the first
day of our acquaintance, and indeed it was inevitable. My first impression was so
overwhelming that to this day I cannot get rid of my illusions; I am still tempted to imagine
that nature had some grand, marvellous design when she created that girl.
Ariadne's voice, her walk, her hat, even her footprints on the sandy bank where she used to
angle for gudgeon, filled me with delight and a passionate hunger for life. I judged of her
spiritual being from her lovely face and lovely figure, and every word, every smile of
Ariadne's bewitched me, conquered me and forced me to believe in the loftiness of her soul.
She was friendly, ready to talk, gay and simple in her manners. She had a poetic belief in
God, made poetic reflections about death, and there was such a wealth of varying shades in
her spiritual organisation that even her faults seemed in her to carry with them peculiar,
charming qualities. Suppose she wanted a new horse and had no money -- what did that
matter? Something might be sold or pawned, or if the steward swore that nothing could
possibly be sold or pawned, the iron roofs might be torn off the lodges and taken to the
factory, or at the very busiest time the farm-horses might be driven to the market and sold
there for next to nothing. These unbridled desires reduced the whole household to despair at
times, but she expressed them with such refinement that everything was forgiven her; all
things were permitted her as to a goddess or to Cæsar's wife. My love was pathetic and was
soon noticed by every one -- my father, the neighbours, and the peasants -- and they all
sympathised with me. When I stood the workmen vodka, they would bow and say: "May
the Kotlovitch young lady be your bride, please God!"
And Ariadne herself knew that I loved her. She would often ride over on horseback or drive